top of page
  • Writer's pictureGail The Parenting Coach

The New Way to Use Elf On The Shelf

Most parents have heard of the popular toy, Elf on the Shelf. It's time to take a look at how using this toy for control instead of positive reinforcement could cause chaos in your home.

It's All Fun and Games Having an elf on the shelf sounds magical, fun, and entertaining for families. Having an elf hide all over the house doing mischievous activities sounds hilarious.

Having an elf on the shelf sounds like a lot of laughs and  innocent fun, but according to the rules on the box, the elf reports back to Santa every night so that Santa knows who has been good or bad, and who gets presents and who gets coal.

Please consider your intention for having an Elf on the Shelf.

Think About It...

Having an elf who “reports” back to Santa about a child's conduct in an effort to control behavior is manipulative.

Having an elf who tries to scare children into behaving by making threats will cause them to feel anxious. And empty threats are really just broken promises which makes the elf not trustworthy.

Having an elf who tattles to Santa about “bad” behaviors and “bad” kids, means he’s focusing on what children are doing wrong rather than what they are doing right.  

3 Better Ways to Use Elf On The Shelf

  1. Have the elf notice helpful desirable behaviors, and almost like magic, children will want to continue such behaviors because it feels great inside.

  2. Have that cute fella use his loving eyes to draw attention to whatever behaviors you want to grow this holiday, because whatever that elf focuses on, he’ll get more of.

  3. Have the elf actually deliver helpful, kind, loving information back to Santa. 



Commenting has been turned off.
bottom of page